Day 17 – Saturday

I have decided to stop taking both the Tramadol SR and the short-acting. I have restless legs but I use all my will power and refuse to move them. I take two Panadeine Forte to cope and go to an appointment with Jacques, he says he isn’t fond of the new, mellow Karen and wouldn’t it be dreadful if I stayed like this as the real Karen is more fun. I replied that Nick felt the same way and told me off the other day as I was enquiring as to how he was doing. He said this was very strange and being so nice didn’t suit me!

We walked 25 minutes to the shopping centre and I got very tired. As it was raining we caught the tram home but I had still managed to walk four kilometers for the day. We watched a movie. I can definitely feel my mind clearing. I’m still taking Panadeine Forte as the aching legs are such a drag. It would be better if the weather wasn’t so miserable as lying around makes it harder to ignore them.

I’m still talking slower than normal but I can speed it up to appear more normal when I am talking to people who don’t know about my hospital stay. I don’t think the Panadeine Forte is helping with my restless legs so I’m not going to take it anymore. By 10pm I am seriously struggling. My legs are aching (pills don’t work) and I am finding it mentally difficult to continue fighting. However, I have no choice. I will go to sleep so my bodily discomfort disappears.

This treatment is not for the light-hearted, it really sucks and at this stage I really feel that I lack medical support. I am on my own and I have to manage from within. Tomorrow will be a new, better day.

Day 18 – Sunday

I’m up again at 6am. Wow, this waking early is strange. My legs are driving me crazy so I give in and take two Tramadol as I know the Panadeine Forte doesn’t help. Nick says I woke him up in the middle of the night saying that I had to log on to his computer to write stuff down and could he please help me (I never use his computer). I apologise for waking him up and said I must have been asleep, this is hilarious, I have no memory of this. This shows how important this blog is to me.

A busy day and my first day without having a lie down. We walked three k’s, I took two Panadeine Forte at lunchtime but that was mainly because I spent 1 ½ hours in the car. At 6pm I went back to resting on the bed. I am feeling much clearer in my mind but am still occasionally losing my train of thought. By 8.30pm my back pain started to become an issue so we went for a 20-minute walk in the rain.

Day 19 – Monday

When I wake up the back pain is more manageable, my mind feels clearer and my legs are better so hopefully this is the beginning of the end. At 9.30am I go to the osteo and afterwards I feel like lying down for an hour or so, but work emails keep interrupting me. I do some grocery shopping and then drive to the pool. I feel normal when I am driving and my mind feels almost back to normal. I walk in the water for 20 minutes - it’s boring but is very beneficial. The aching legs have stopped. Wonderful! I just need to get the pain settled and everything will be great.

Day 20 – Tuesday

I wake at 6.30am with aching legs and my body aches. I think I need to get moving and I take a Tramadol SR. At 7.30am I catch the train down to the Mornington Peninsula as I have a busy day with appointments and I know driving big distances is still too hard. I am so thankful that Kay and Rose drive me around to my appointments for the day. I go to my GP who agrees with me that my mind is still not clear and gives me Tramadol just in case I need it. My neighbour Kat picks me up from the station and we get home just after 5pm. I rest while working and reading.

Day 21 – Wednesday

I woke at 6.30am with legs aching again! I take a Tramadol SR  but I think I might have given in too early to taking pain relief because once I get up and get busy I don’t have the ache. However, my body does feel like it’s been run over by a truck so I take two Panadeine Forte. I do some work, run some errands, do some housework and ironing, but this results in me feeling so bodily tired, worse than yesterday. Yesterday I was with people so that probably kept me going. I need to get my act together as I have things I need to do.

I have struggled all today with tiredness. It’s three weeks tomorrow since I went to hospital. It would have been nice to have known how useless I would be for such a long time. What if I had a normal job that required me to function on top form all day?

I spend the day running around, doing chores and working. However I am so tired that every hour or so I have to go and lie down on the bed. I’m really over the tiredness but I am not sleeping a lot so this exacerbates the problem. Please let all of this disappear! I need my life back. By 9.45pm I am so exhausted I go to sleep.

Day 22 – Thursday Three Weeks Today

It’s three weeks today that I was admitted to hospital and for the first time I slept, not just 8 hours but 9 ½ and not unsurprisingly, I feel so much better. I still have some aching lower legs and a little neck/shoulder pain bit it’s all manageable. I plan to clean my house today as it’s not normal for it to be this dirty, to do this I need to feel good so I take one Tramadol SR to help me through the day. 

I managed to get the house clean with many rests in between working but I definitely have more energy. I go for an osteo visit and get through the day until 5.15pm (when I take two Panadeine Forte for shoulder/neck pain) without taking any more pain meds and I feel quite pleased with this achievement.  My mind feels better, as in I feel more motivated to tackle some work documents that I need to update. I am asleep by 10.30 and don’t wake up until 7.30am. Excellent!

Day 23 – Friday

I wake up with those stupid aching legs and I have a bit of driving to do today so I take a Tramadol SR. I manage the half-hour drive to collect Marie and then half an hour to her hospital appointment. I spend a couple of hours at the hospital and then go home. 

Rachel comes over for the first time in four weeks and we spend a lovely few hours together. Friends tell me that today is the first day that I sound normal and it’s the first day I feel normal. It’s also the first day that I don’t need to rest during the day and, apart from a bit of short-term memory loss, I feel I am almost there as my mind feels light and clear.